The Top 10 Kanye West Tweets About DONDA, His New Everything Venture

If you've been anywhere near Twitter this evening, you know something truly wonderful and unique and amazing and THE BEST is happening. In the space of two hours, Kanye West has tweeted 60 times and counting on, uh, his earnest pursuits in the realm of fashion and graphic design and nutrition and architecture and… » 1/05/12 1:28am 1/05/12 1:28am

Man Swings His Nuts in Front of Packed Alvin and the Chipmunks Screening

Tooth-deficient Chicago cinefile Edward Brown got a little overenthused during a recent screening of odds-on Oscars favorite Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked. According to police, Brown, 34, disrobed and "paraded in front of the audience at the North Riverside Park Mall's Classic Cinema." » 1/05/12 12:20am 1/05/12 12:20am

A Serial Killer Is Stalking the O.C.'s Homeless

"What we believe to be a serious, dangerous serial killer operating in Orange County" is how police described the man who has now stabbed three homeless men to death on California streets. The first victim, James McGillivray, 53, was killed on December 20, as he slept outside a shopping mall in Placentia. The second,… » 1/04/12 11:45pm 1/04/12 11:45pm

Rule #1 For Kids' Clothing Catalogs: No Naked Men

If there's one thing I think that most of us can agree on, it's that the internet can never have too few images of children frolicking in the surf as a naked man lingers ominously in the background. Right? That's just a given. Apparently the memo had not swung around to the marketing team of La Redoute, however, which… » 1/04/12 10:54pm 1/04/12 10:54pm

Chinese Billionaire Killed by Poisoned Cat Meat Stew

A billionaire tycoon from China named Long Liyuan died suddenly and mysteriously two days before Christmas. The only clue: a still-steaming bowl of half-eaten cat stew. Could it be? No, it's simply too easy, too dastardly, altogether too meowtrageous! But it's true: The cat stew was poisoned! » 1/04/12 10:08pm 1/04/12 10:08pm

Man Knifed Because He Didn't Know Jay-Z and Beyoncé Are Married

As the world sat glued to their media display devices awaiting the latest Beyoncé BabyWatch developments, one man — a 48-year-old resident of Ohio — whiled away the holiday weekend in a state of blissful Beyoncé ignorance. Not only was he unaware that a Lil-Z might shimmy out from between her million-dollar legs at… » 1/04/12 9:11pm 1/04/12 9:11pm

Now Here's Henry the Weatherman With Your Hissy Fit

KTLA weatherman Henry DiCarlo had a bit of a temper tantrum on the air today. He was just trying to conduct a Toys for Tots interview on location at L.A.'s Union Station when someone put up the weather report graphic, and there was an empty space for where Henry was supposed to go, but he was just trying to get… » 12/23/11 12:02am 12/23/11 12:02am

Long Lost Radiohead Song 'Putting Ketchup in the Fridge' is Probably…

A number of credible music outlets — NME, Spin, and Stereogum, to name a few — are passing along a supposed long-lost Radiohead track called "Putting Ketchup in the Fridge" that has recently surfaced online. As with so many too-good-to-be-true Radiohead rumors these days, it's probably fake. [Updated below.] » 12/22/11 11:12pm 12/22/11 11:12pm

Bored to Death's Creator Would Like to Buy You a Drink

Saddened over the recent loss of HBO's hipster mystery (mipstery?) Bored To Death? So is Jonathan Ames, the guy who created it. But what's the point in wallowing in self-pity, if you can wallow in self-pity while drunk and surrounded by dozens of sympathetic fans? Wait, did I say dozens? How about hundreds! Thousands!… » 12/21/11 2:28am 12/21/11 2:28am

Will Canadians Wipe Out HIV?

A team of researchers working out of the University of Western Ontario in London, Ontario, have received approval from the U.S. Food and Drug Administration to begin clinical trials of an HIV vaccine on humans beginning in January. What makes this vaccine different from the handful of others in development around the… » 12/21/11 1:26am 12/21/11 1:26am

National Menorah Vastly Overcompensating For Something

Happy Hanukkah, to one and all! Sorry — I mean happy holidays. Actually, no I don't. I mean Happy Hanukkah! Let your Heeb flag fly! Gorge on gelt! Lose it on latkes! Spin a dreidel once, watch it fall over, get bored, and go open a present! Hanukkah comes but once a year, and lasts a fleeting eight nights, so best to… » 12/21/11 12:16am 12/21/11 12:16am

The Hobbit: Dead Ringer

After seven years of rights disputes and one false start, here it finally is — the first teaser for Peter Jackson's The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey. It's the first part of Jackson's two-part retelling of J.R.R. Tolkien's The Hobbit, set to debut a full year from now. And good god, it's fucking The Lord of the Rings » 12/20/11 11:14pm 12/20/11 11:14pm

Pen Recovered From Woman's Stomach 25 Years Later Still Writes

I have a cup on my desk filled with approximately two dozen pens, which at any given time yields a total of maybe one working writing instrument whenever I need it — usually a dull pencil or crayon. That's just my crappy luck. So you'll forgive me if I experience just a twinge of envy when relaying the tale of the… » 12/20/11 12:10am 12/20/11 12:10am

Pudding-Dispensing Robot Programmed to Threaten Children

You know, if there's one thing America could use fewer of right now, it's human beings performing services in exchange for money. What are those called again? Oh right, jobs. Too many jobs! Let's eliminate positions! Like pudding sample dispensation technician, for example. How long have we been pressed under the… » 12/19/11 10:58pm 12/19/11 10:58pm

Dutch TV Hosts Dine On Each Other's Flesh

[Updated below.] A reality show from the Netherlands called Proefkonijnen ("Guinea Pigs") set about tackling the ultimate taboo head-on. No, not that taboo. The other taboo: Cannibalism! The gluttonous consumption of tasty, fatty, crispy-skinned human flesh. Mmmmmm. Peeeeeople. So co-hosts Dennis Storm and Valerio… » 12/19/11 10:17pm 12/19/11 10:17pm

Man Drives Dead Wife 225 Miles Back to Canada

Holiday downer time! A couple in their 70s had their vacation cut short when the wife died in the car, somewhere around Pasco, Washington. The husband made the decision to turn the vehicle around and drive back home to attend to his wife's burial. But home was 225 miles north, across the Canada-U.S. border, in Oliver,… » 12/19/11 9:45pm 12/19/11 9:45pm

Demonic Golf Cart Terrorizes High School Football Game

You know, the one thing not missing from the Friday Night Lights series finale was the presence of a possessed golf cart mowing down the Permian Panthers' defensive line. The Spring Dekaney Wildcats were not so lucky: The Texan high school football team were barely able to celebrate their new state title when just… » 12/18/11 11:59pm 12/18/11 11:59pm